ABUSEFemale Sickler Doctor Brutally Assaulted By Male Colleague In Ile-Ife Seeks Justice

Concerned colleagues of a female doctor who was brutally assaulted by her male colleague are seeking justice on her behalf.

Below is the statement they released to the press:

We feel obliged to inform you of a disastrous and mind troubling incident. Dr Theresa is a Senior Registrar 1 in the department of Psychiatry of Obafemi Awolowo University Teaching Hospital (Ile-Ife). She is a very gentle, easy going, ever smiling & hardworking resident doctor who has been battling sickle cell disease for more than 30 years.
This incident occurred at her residence in the early hours of Thursday 25th February 2016 in her service apartment building situated outside the hospital where she resides. Dr. Okpara, [A Wing Commander in the Nigerian Air Force] who is a resident Doctor in the Dept of Community Medicine in the same hospital where Theresa works also resides in that compound.

The parking lot within the compound is inadequate and as such tenants would have to occasionally call each other (through the security guard) to move their cars in the morning so that individuals are able to drive out. According to an eye witness (who is a doctor in the same hospital and also lives within the same compound), Dr Theresa’s car was obstructing Dr. Okpara’s car and he called her out to move her car. She had told him she was dressing up and would soon be out but he kept shouting and calling her. When she came out, he was still abusing her and being verbally aggressive. She then told him to take it easy since she had already told him she was dressing up and reminded him that he also does the same thing whenever his car is obstructing someone else’s.

As Theresa came out, entered her car and fastened her seat belt to drive out of the parking lot, Dr. Okpara continued barking asking her to move her car out, she told him she was already in the car and asked if he wanted to move it out himself? He then said he will teach her a lesson and went swiflty around the car, opened her car door and held her dress and punched her face several times. The Co-tenants had to run out to pull him away from her. At a point he reached for his metal pedal lock and was again restrained by tenants.

Following the incident he showed no remorse, as he continued in his verbal aggression with his shirt buttons undone calling her names. He also dared her to call whoever in Abuja suggesting that he was above the law as she made attempts to make calls after the incident.

Dr. Theresa was rushed to the hospital as being a known Sickle cell disease patient, her health was paramount at the time. On arrival, it was confirmed that indeed she had Cerebrospinal fluid leaking from her brain. This continued to be copious before ameliorating after some hours. In adition to the frontal bone fracture detected initially, a further depressed nasal bone fracture was detected on CT scan. Theresa now has to decide between going for surgery to correct the facial deformity or live with a disfigured face.

Please join us in prayers for Theresa’s quick recovery, while we fight to ensure that Dr. Okpara is brought to Justice.

We would appreciate your help in giving this much needed publicity.

Sincerely yours,
Dr Lekan Abudu
On behalf of concerned colleagues

Texting habits that could sabotage relationships

In a romantic relationship, text messages can be great for making plans, checking in, sharing a joke or sending a flirty message. However, the immediacy of texting enables a couple to be in touch all day every day, and that’s not always a good thing.

Texting is convenient and seems low-risk, but those little messages can get a relationship off on the wrong foot or derail it after it's been established. Texting can be a tricky form of communication because it’s stripped of body language and facial expressions.

To keep a relationship going, avoid these texting pitfalls:

1. Texting too often: A study at Brigham Young University found that too frequent texting is associated with low relationship quality. The reasons for this are not clear, but researchers speculate that couples might use texting to avoid in-person conversation. Too much texting could also lead to a cycle of “mobile relationship maintenance,” where partners feel obligated to respond to every text within a few minutes, according to Psychology Today.

2. Too intense, too soon: Too much back and forth or excessively flirty texts early in a relationship can cause the relationship to flame out before it gets going, self-help author Laurel House told Shape Magazine. Often a partner “will bolt if you abuse texting early on,” House said.

3. Texting men at work: A recent Match.com survey found that 47 percent of men don’t like receiving romantic texts at work, Time magazine reported. Of course, that means about half of all men are OK with texts during work hours.

4. Using texts to discuss relationship issues: The BYU study found that couples who use text messages to settle disagreements, apologize or make decisions had lower relationship satisfaction. Distance and the limited text format don't facilitate serious conversations.

5. Poorly written texts: The Match.com survey reported excessive grammar errors and typos, one-word answers like “k” and “cool,” and using all caps as the top texting turn-offs.

6. Texting during a date: This is the No. 1 faux pas on a first date, according to asurvey by SF Weekly.

In spite of these potential pitfalls, texting can be good for a relationship. Expressing affection via text enhances relationships for both men and women, the BYU study found.

8 ways to actually find a man you love

• Though Hollywood portrays falling in love as instantaneous, in the real world, it's not usually the case. For the non-rom-com star, there are not-so-great dates to be endured before meeting Mr. Right. Unless you love playing the dating game over and over and over again, you can use a handful of ways to streamline the process to date people you'd honestly want to date.

• Walk down memory lane

  Not that you need to live in the past, but there are some truths to be found from boyfriends who turned out not to be your one true love. Before you start dating again, think about things you loved about past relationships while also considering things you won't stand for in another boyfriend. Doing just that will help you avoid a second date with someone who might seem perfect but actually just reminds you of the rocker you dated in high school.

• Figure yourself out

  If you aren't exactly sure what you are looking for in a man, Mr. Wonderful could waltz right up and you wouldn't take a second glance. Be sure you know who you are before you get mixed up in a relationship. Establish your personality, your goals, your qualities, etc. before jumping into the dating scene.

• Listen to the Spice Girls

  There's some serious truth to the classic Spice Girls' line, "If you wanna be my lover, you gotta get with my friends." Blind dates aren't all bad if your friends can help do some date screening to find someone you'd be compatible with. (As an important note, "He's single, and you're single" is not enough in common for a set up.) Let your friends know what kind of person you're interested in dating, and ask for their help in finding him.

• Match your goals

  If you can tell right off the bat your goals don't match up, there is no use going on a second date. Early on in the relationship, see if you both are looking for the same thing in the relationship like marriage sometime in the future, wanting kids, not wanting kids, etc.

• Be your best yourself

  It's easy to glaze over this tidbit, but you aren't likely to attract anyone if you aren't worth attracting. You are looking for someone who is confident, motivated, happy and so on. Doesn't it make sense that your future partner is looking for the same qualities? Don't forget to spend time focusing on yourself while playing the dating game.

• Do things you like to do

  You are likely to find someone who loves music at a concert, so why not hang around certain venues based on who you'd like to "randomly" bump into? Finding someone with mutual interests is easier when you are in a mutual location.

• Be the person you'd like to date

  You don't want to be someone you are not, but if you are looking for someone who is outgoing, you need more adventure than staying inside on a Friday night. If you want someone outgoing, you are probably going to need to be a little outgoing yourself.

• Be patient

  This last point is a pretty self-explanatory but can't be forgotten. Even when you know what you are looking for, it can take some time for you two to find each other. It's much easier said than done, so be patient.
  And if you do get fed up with the dating game, take comfort. If you aren't dating anyone, there is no way you can end up on a PDA Instagram account.

10 Best Sleep Positions During Pregnancy

 – Why Is It Important?

 

Sleep, glorious sleep! What is more tempting than to curl up in bed after a hard day at work But, ironically, sleep is not the friendliest of bed-mates! In fact, sound sleep is something that eludes most people around the globe. And when you are pregnant, sound sleep is usually the first victim.

But pregnant or not, you need to sleep! So, what can you do about it? Well, the first thing you need to do to sleep peacefully during pregnancy is to find a good position. So, read on to find the best sleep position during pregnancy, right here!

Best Sleep Positions During Pregnancy:

Finding that perfect sleep position during pregnancy can be a battle. But we have made the task easy for you.

Here are the best sleep positions you can try to get a good night’s sleep:

1. Not On Your Back Or Stomach:The first things to remember about pregnancy sleep positions are the don’ts.

• Do not sleep on your back or stomach when you are pregnant.

• Yes, you have always been a back/stomach sleeper but now is the time to break the habit.

• Sleeping on your back can make it harder for you to breath. Also, when you lie on your back, your intestines are pushed back by your growing belly, which can cause complications.

• Sleeping on your stomach too is a no go during pregnancy.

• When you lie on your stomach, it presses your growing uterus as well as breast, causing a good deal of discomfort.

2. Left Is Best:

The best you can do while pregnant is to lie on your side and that too, on your left side. Sleeping on your left side is not just safe but is also more comfortable.

• Sleeping on the left side improves circulation and makes sure that nutrient rich blood reaches your baby without any trouble.

• When you are lying on your left side, the liver has it easy too.

3. Try SOS:

The Sleep On Side (SOS) position is the best sleep position during pregnancy.

4. Bent Knees:

While you sleep on your side, you can bend your legs and knees to find a comfortable position. And to make it more relaxing, place a pillow between your legs.

5. Belly Comfort:

Another great way to find comfort while sleeping on the SOS position is to place a pillow under your growing abdomen.

6. Beat Heartburn:

Heartburn is a common complaint during pregnancy. You can prop up your upper body with a pillow to sleep in peace even when you experience heartburn at night.

7. Breathe Easy:

Many women experience shortness of breath during late pregnancy. If that is the case, try lying on your side, with your head propped up.

8. Support The Back:

Another good way to get a good night’s sleep during late pregnancy is to place a pillow behind your back to give your body some support and prevent a backache.

Nollywood actor Fesyud Aguebor has died... Nollywood actor, Fesyud Aguebor has died. He died after a brief illness last week. May his soul rest in peace! Amen!

Nollywood actor, Fesyud Aguebor has died. He died after a brief illness last week. May his soul rest in peace! Amen!

Photos: Woman delivered from the 'spirit of madness' at Lagos church

According to the church, His Dominion Ministries Intl that shared the photos on its Facebook page, God delivered the woman identified as Joy from spirit of madness during a prophetic service last Thursday. She said that something hit her head and she heard a voice singing and she came in to the service. The pastor prayed with her, after which she took a bath and was given new clothes. See more photos after the cut...

 

7 Things You Must Know About Yourself Before You Get Married

In the classic book, Art of War, Suz Tzu states, “If you know the enemy and know yourself, you need not fear the result of a hundred battles. If you know yourself but not the enemy, for every victory gained you will also suffer a defeat. If you know neither the enemy nor yourself, you will succumb in every battle.”

Then, we have Shakespeare who coined the phrase, “to thyself be true”.

It is within these two powerful quotes that capture one of the most important things you could ever do which is to learn yourself. One of the greatest assets for going into marriage is knowing oneself well.

Here are 7 things you must know about yourself before you get married.

1. Know what tempts you.

Some have bought into the lie that when you get married that your attraction will be only for your spouse. This is the furthest from the truth. Self control is one of the most important qualities to master before you get married. You must know what your weaknesses are before you marry so you can stay far away from them within marriage. Adultery is nothing to play with and has ruined many lives.

2. What you’re good at.

Just like you should learn what your weaknesses are you should also learn what comes natural to you. Another powerful asset to marriage is knowing what you bring to the table. No man or woman wants to marry a person that doesn’t increase their overall value as a couple. When I met my wife I knew immediately how she added to me by recognizing her strengths in comparison to my weaknesses.

3. Know where you spend your time.

Have you ever taken your entire week and assessed it for where you spent every single minute of your day. Talking about learning yourself. My mercy. You will immediately learn where you’re wasting to much time and also the things that you’re neglecting

4. What entertains you.What do you like to do for fun? What makes you laugh?   What do you like to do calm down and enjoy the results of a job well done. Being a workaholic in marriage can suck the life out of your marriage very quick.   Learn now how to have fun doing what entertains you.

5. What motivates you.

We all have those days where we don’t want to get out of bed due to the overwhelming stress of life, heavy responsibilities, and sometimes pure I don’t care anymore thoughts. It is at these times you must know what motivates you. What will you find refuge in for a source of revitalizing your passion towards life. I have days where I want to quit, but then I think on the things that are my why for life. It is these things that help me fight the good fight each and every day. What are your whys for life? What motivates you to keep going when life is knocking you down?

6. What hurts you.

Everyone hurts differently and is hurt by different things. What you have to realize is that hurting is a part of relationships. I love it how this lyrical genius put it in this song, “ Truth is everybody is going to hurt you: you just gotta find the ones worth suffering for.” You can’t go into any relationship with the fear of getting hurt. That is the great risk of loving people. But, it is good to know what hurts you in order to help those close to you. My wife and I had a very candid conversations about the things that hurt each other. We both had different things, and because of that conversation I know how to love her better.

7. Your love language

We all give and receive love differently. Knowing your love language is so pivotal for the health of your relationships. The 5 love languages are, words of affirmation, quality time, acts of service, gifts, and physical touch. It is found that what you do the most naturally is usually your love language.

I pray these 7 things will help you dive deeper into learning yourself better in order to be a greater asset to your future spouse.

How to be Inspired When "Life" Leaves You Inspiration-less

Life Happens

What do you do when “life” happens and you become so consumed by your day to day activities that you have succumbed to routine and complacency? Your day is full from the moment that your alarm clock sounds or your children stand over your sleeping body asking for cereal.

You spend your day chauffeuring these pint sized people to and from school and to and from after school activities. You shop for groceries, put away the groceries, and then cook the groceries. Between doing laundry and cleaning the house, you somehow manage to squeeze in a cup of coffee and maybe a meal for yourself. For some all of this has to be juggled around a full work schedule. 

In the midst of all of these things, you don’t even realize that have lost your inspiration, the thing that you love to do, the things that gives you that breath of fresh air. Somehow that which gives you life and purpose amongst your “must do’s” has managed to take a back seat so far back that you don’t even remember what it felt like embrace it, wooed by it, inspired by it.

What do you do then?

How do you get back to a place where you are not running on autopilot, but on the inside your heart is smiling with anticipation of doing that one thing that makes you happy? 

What is it that you have neglected in your unintentional pursuit of ordinary?

Maybe you a writer with no time to put pen to paper or a photographer who hasn’t been able to see the beauty of nature because of traffic. Perhaps you are musician but life is so cluttered that you would rather sit in silence during your down time than pick up your instrument. No matter what your “thing” is, it’s yours, it’s part of who you are, and it deserves your attention too. 

5 Tips to get your inspiration back

• 1. A Vision Board is a great way to remind yourself visually of things that you love. What to put on your vision board: Pictures from a magazine, quotes, or cards, hand written notes or doodles that inspire you. Put the vision board someplace that you will see it often throughout your day
• 2. Think back to the last time that you felt inspired. Where were you? What were you doing? Now think about what has changed since then. If the change can be altered so that it’s not an “inspiration killer” make the necessary changes. If the changes are a necessity, find ways to accommodate those changes in other ways; maybe at different times of the day or on different days all together. 
• 3. Join a group or take a class. If you love to cook, take a cooking class. If you are a writer join a book club and allow someone else’s work provoke you to writing again. 
• 4. Go somewhere and be still. There are times when our minds are so busy thinking of everything and everyone else that we neglect our own wants and desires. Take a drive, sit on the beach, find a place away from the noise and routine to be alone. Let the scenery and the silence inspire you.
• Just do it. Sometimes the only thing that will get you going again is just to do it. Push past how you feel and just do it. Make time in your schedule and just do it. It may be hard but it will jump start you again.

6 ways to overcome your fear of infidelity

• Fear of infidelity can come from a variety of sources. Maybe you watched your parents deal with pain and a collapsed relationship as a result of infidelity. Maybe you personally have suffered because a partner was unfaithful. Or maybe you are simply disturbed by the pervasiveness of this evil, and how it's become the topic of many television shows and books.
  At any rate, your fears about infidelity are not unfounded. However, just because you have ample reason to doubt the soundness of a relationship doesn't mean that you actually should doubt it.
  Here are 6 things that can help you overcome your fears of infidelity:

• 1. Recognize that fear is not productive

  Sometimes we feel that worry helps us to prevent terrible things from happening. The fact of the matter is that they will happen in spite of our anxiety over them. Realizing that harboring fear towards infidelity will do nothing to prevent it from actually happening is the first step towards overcoming your fears.

• 2. Avoid generalizations

  Your fear of infidelity likely doesn't come from your partner himself but from past relationships, stories in movies, family history etc. This means that you are assigning attributes and actions of other people to your partner although he has done nothing to earn.
  Don't generalize your partner, putting him in a group of cheaters. Choose to believe that these generalizations don't apply to him. Judge him based on his own actions, not the actions of others.

• 3. Express your fears

  Make your partner aware of your concerns about infidelity. You should be cautious about allowing your fears to dominate every conversation but you should feel free to express your fears to your partner. Not only will this make him aware of things he might do that could trigger your fears, it will create an atmosphere of trust as you learn to confide concerns in your partner. The trust fostered by this communication will help you overcome the feeling that he will cheat on you.

• 4. Care for your relationship

  Do what you can to fight infidelity head on. The best way to guard against infidelity is through strengthening your relationship. Go on dates, communicate, serve each other, express your love, etc. The more you develop your relationship, the more power it will have to withstand infidelity and the more confidence you will have in it.

• 5. Care for yourself

  Do what you can to make sure you are happy yourself. Discover things outside of your relationship that bring you joy. These things may be hobbies or friends; they could be your job or volunteer opportunities
  As you develop your own independent happiness, you will realize you are not dependent on your partner. This means that your fears will be at least partially placated as you realize you are not reliant on your relationship for happiness. Knowing that you are a resilient person who has the ability to overcome challenges, will make you less fearful of tragedies such as infidelity.

• 6. See a counselor

  Sometimes it's necessary to seek professional help. Consider talking to someone who can professionally and personally guide you through the process of overcoming your anxiety about cheating.